Saturday, May 22, 2010

4 weeks since my surgery

Time certainly does fly. Four weeks ago yesterday I was being prepped for surgery, quite possibly the scariest day of my life. Now here I sit in my perfect apartment feeling better then ever. My strength is starting to return, the mobility in my arms is improving slowly but surely. The pain in my right arm has subsided. I am adjusting to all the foreign objects on my chest. The chest expanders and port kind of feel like I have a shirt on that is a too tight (not the stretchy kind) sometimes I notice it and sometimes I don't. My brain is a little foggy something I really hadn't noticed until I started getting busier, I am feeling a little scattered at times. Some say this could be residuals of the general anesthesia . Healing takes time and the energy comes from so many places. The human body is miraculous and can thrive under so many conditions. I am grateful for my body and the speed at which I am recovering.

This week I felt strong enough to return to work. I work in my mother's small restaurant. I may have the best job in the world, the pay is not the greatest but the rewards are many. Normally my job requirements are serve food, chop vegetables (LOTS of vegetables), prep appetizers, help mom cook when necessary and kind of hang out all day with our wonderful customers. I was responsible for lots of stuff, it wasn't necessarily hard work, just busy doing all sorts of things throughout the day. My post surgery abilities currently allow me to only serve food and visit with customers, that is pretty much it. That was the easy part of my job, the other part was important to help my mom out. I am sure my stamina will return, so until then my niece Kate has joined the team and is helping out. I love that my niece will be around more, she is an amazing young woman who I don't get to see enough of.

It was so nice to see all of my family/friends/customers, in my eyes there really aren't lines between these groups they are just all a big group of love, one that nourishes my spirit every moment. I am eternally grateful for all of you and blessed to have each of you in my life. The connection that I have to people around me is anchored in my belief of complete love and acceptance for ALL people, NO EXCEPTIONS. I am diligently working on the exceptions which of course is my great life lesson. Life takes work, but when you are on the right path it is not so hard, blessings rain on us at every moment and sometimes when we get out of the way, we can allow true healing to begin. This by no means means that I am this calm zen like being that is enlightened all of the sudden. Love is my core, the rest of me can still be engaging, fiery, provocative, woman that you all know and love. Balance is something I have been seeking for a long time, and it seems I am getting closer.

My mission it to relax and trust that everything is happening exactly as it should be.
Drink water and breathe.........


  1. Kudos to that loving, engaging, fiery, provacative woman that you are! That's why we all love you!!

  2. Sarah: I'm coming to you by way of your brother. You have a wonderful blog but I'm kinda sorry you started it due to your physical issues. You are a terrific writer and bring to life what you have to say. I'm a nurse, as I see some of your commenters are. Thank you for sharing your story. May it help you get through and also help others if they find themselves in the same position. Your manner of expressing your feelings helps me to understand what my patients go through. I would say that you are very brave but as you know - you were handed this hot potato and now have to carry it no matter what - the courage comes in your putting it down in a blog to share with others. Thank you for doing this and may the Holy Spirit travel with all of your therapies and bring to an end all that is attackng your body.. God bless/